"Mommy, Did you Nana was in the hospital for a few days?"
"Yes."
"I was sad, when she was there."
"Me, too, sweet heart. But the doctors made her better, right?"
"Jesus made her better," he corrected me, "because Miss Grace prayed for her."
"A lot of people prayed for her and you're right, Jesus made her better."
"Now she's home. I'm happy she's home so she can take me to the airport, now."
(They love going to the airport together to watch the planes)
The trauma of that day, the day my Mom had her heart attack, is still very raw for all of us, even the smallest members of our family were, clearly impacted. I can't begin to thank all of you enough. For prayers, for thoughts, for phone calls, for messages on my voice mail, for emails, for your love, and for your understanding of why I still haven't called you back. I'd love to sugar coat it all. To brush it all off my shoulders and to say that it's fine because she's fine now. But the truth is, when I saw my mom in the emergency room, in more pain than I've ever seen any human being, pale as a ghost and clearly talking as if she were saying her last words to me, my own heart suffered an emotional attack. It's funny how your mom, even when you're in your 30s, is still supposed to be untouchable. I can count on one hand how many times I've ever seen my mom sick at all. In that moment, as I held her hand dashing down the hall to the operating room, I remember thinking about Oalin. How in the world would I ever tell him that something happened to his biggest fan, his best friend, his Nana. There is a bond between them that is unlike any other. I can't describe the love that they have, but it's different, different than the love between a mother and child, different than the love between husband and wife. So warm and so incredibly special. I know that bond because I had it with my own grandmother, my Memere. During this past month, I've thought a lot about her. If I could come up with one phrase that would sum up what I believe my Memere stood for it would be, "Family is all that matters." My mom had few guests while she was hospitalized, she really just needed to recover. But seeing all of her siblings come to visit for, quite literally, 5 minutes (because that was all my mom could handle) was so heart warming, so supportive. As much as I knew everything was going to be okay, having the thoughts and prayers from family and close friends was truly what held me together and what helped my mom to recover. The biggest irony I have realized in a profound way is that on Christmas we celebrate the birth of Jesus, yet, he didn't receive a present. We did. The life of my mom.
Oalin and Nana at the Airport
3 comments:
Well said....I can't imagine life if things had turned out differently that day. I thank God for "making her better" and giving us more time on this earth to enjoy each other (lunch, phone calls, talks about grandchildren, etc.). Sometimes we go along without a care and then something like this puts it all in perspective and we realize how precious life.
Love,
Aunt Doris
Well, your blog post did a wonderful job of making me cry! It was such a hard time to be so far. I did and still do just want to give you and your mom a huge hug. I love you and I am so thankful for the wonderful family we have.
I want to say thank you for all the prayers and support I received during that difficult time. Kerri, you were always there for me. Every time I open my eyes I would see your smiling face. Never letting on how worried you were or how tired you were from the long ordeal. Your calming way was always assuring to me.
It’s funny but I felt that our rolls had reversed and you were now taking care of me. What I remember the most about that first day is you whispering in my ear before I went to the CATH Lab. Think positive thoughts, you said, you wont make it if you don’t think positive thoughts. Thank you. You don’t know how much you helped me at that moment. Kerri, Memere was right. When all is said and done family is what counts. It is the most valuable gift one can have and so important to pass on to your children.
Love, Hugs and Kisses forever,
Mom
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